This is a new feature I am experimenting with for my blog, a weekly edition of what I call, ‘I’m Just Saying’. Let’s go.

The topic of this week’s ‘I’m Just Saying’ is children. Not all children, but most children. As a single, non-maternal 25-year-old, I have no children and have no want, longing, inclination, or desire to even have them. Conceiving or adopting. Not interested. What gets under my skin, surprisingly even more than the archaic idea that all women must want and must have children, is the attention that children receive. No, silly, I don’t mean parental attention – obviously, I want people to feed, shelter, and clothe their children, not to mention keep them quiet around me. I mean this utter ridiculousness that goes on on Facebook.

Every day, sometimes countless times a day, usually once every 2-3 hours, I am subjected to this mind-numbing plethora of baby pictures. I understand sharing a few sometimes – special occasions, big deals, injuries, firsts, and the like. But I don’t need nor do I want to see a picture of your child sleeping, licking their hands, drooling, Photoshopped to look like a model, and especially NAKED! In most jurisdictions these days, whether rightly or wrongly, they would classify naked pictures of children and babies as pedophiliac porn. Don’t say I didn’t warn you – and do you really think in the midst of all those ‘friends’ you have that someone might be ‘like-ing’ them a little too much? I’m just saying.

I’m glad you love your children, and despite what people think – not wanting children on, around, or near me does NOT equate to me wishing them harm, et cetera. I think they stink, they’re loud, they’re annoying, and they’re too damn needy if you ask me. I know you didn’t ask me. But I’m telling you anyway. I mean, I’m just saying….cool it with the pictures. I am generally not interested or impressed 99% of the time. There are surely more things in one’s life than children. And don’t tell me your children are your life or how hard being a mom or single mom is. Face it – you chose to have children. Let’s see, there’s birth control, abstinence, abortion, to name a few. When it’s your own goddamn choice, don’t make yourself sound so self-important because you’re a mother, or father. As Shania would say, “That don’t impress me much!”

Thanks for reading 🙂

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About Aloha Mister Hand

28, horror-loving chick, lover of animals, movies, and her boyfriend.

22 responses »

  1. RaoulDukeKD says:

    The worst is when they change their profile pictures and cover photos to pictures of their babies. if I ever do have a child, I will never let myself become that person.

    • Hahaha, absolutely agree with you 100%! It borders on insanity and unhealthy obsession. Like, get a pet rock for crying out loud. A living person is going to grow up either hating you or having an ego the size of Mt. Kilimanjaro!

      • RaoulDukeKD says:

        And since this is such a new phenomenon, we don’t know what kind of psychological damage this could do to these kids when they grow up, or if it could effect their employment opportunities having these photos of them everywhere and easily available. It’s pretty fucked.

  2. jmount43 says:

    People have asked me before whether or not I like children. I tell them, yes, of course I like children; as long as at the end of the day I can give them back to whoever they belong to with no strings attached.

  3. Shania’s song makes me want to put something very large and uncomfortable where it would not fit without a great deal of force. But that is a whole other story that touches on what is wrong with the decaying remnants of pop culture. Let us focus on the subject at hand.

    I have a sister who is nearly two years younger than me. She now has three children, one of whom is already big enough that he is already larger than his twin sisters in spite of being a similar (if not wider) gap age-wise.

    Around the time the youngest was announced as expected, I found an article online asking why so many women on Facebook have children with them in every photo they post online. Do they have no sense of identity except as mothers? And so on it goes. I fear that is happening to a great degree to my sister. To some extent, this is understandable. When one has three children who are all less than schooling age, one has to devote an enormous fraction of one’s life to them. (And to his credit, the dad is very actively involved in the childrens’ lives, too.) But it is like she has forgotten that she is a person, too.

    I also share your concern about the use of childrens’ pictures on places like Fudgebook. I know Mark Stealotherpeoples’workberg professes to not believe in privacy (whilst keeping himself very segregated from users, no less), but he is apparently unaware that not only do people like my sister still regard privacy as a right, they normally especially feel privacy should be guaranteed for their children. How many three year olds do you know who would not suffer serious psychological repercussions as a result of having everything they do monitored by potentially millions of people?

    I have grave concerns about what my sister’s children and their peers are going to be feeling about themselves in twenty years unless major changes to our societies take place. Concerns that people like Mark Normietosserberg reinforce with every word they speak. And to think I was so excited for the future when I first saw demonstrations of email in 1988.

    • Well, I don’t live in Ireland, and I’ve known several people who have had abortions, so in general, it is a choice in my hometown, and that’s what I am referring to. People want to have these little creatures, believe me. This girl I know, have known forever, said she wishes she could have 20 children, and I know several girls who continuously get pregnant because they like it, or they simply like the attention. I just think it’s time for women to take their identities back. I personally wouldn’t call it an error in my writing, because I write what I see and know personally. Of course, I know nothing of religion and society in a place like Ireland, but I do know what I see in my female friends in my little college town I reside in. I definitely believe your prior post about the identity of females and about the way children will grow up either resentful of all the lack of privacy or entirely egotistical. All that exposure cannot be good, and personally, it sickens me. I am glad you agree with at least some of my post, because most people wouldn’t have the gall to even write something like this let alone comment in agreement, so I appreciate that. Like George Carlin said, people have a “child fetish” and it’s “not healthy”. 🙂 Appreciate the interaction!!!!

  4. I would also like to point out a serious error in your writing. Even today, the majority of children are not “chosen”. They are at best accidents or at worst forced. The media event in which a woman who was unlucky enough to be in Ireland when she miscarried and her pleas to be treated properly were met with being told “this is a Catholic country” stand as testament to that. With the current level of difficulty the majority of the Human race is having in feeding itself today, the idea of having children being an informed, rational choice is made laughable by the numbers in which people continue having them.

  5. ThereWolf says:

    Got nothing to add really.

    I don’t like baby nudity on telly though, like to advertise a product – even if it’s a baby product. I find it slightly wrong for some reason.

    I always say I don’t like kids. Then I was round at me mates one day… his daughter was, dunno, 2 or 3 and he had to nip out for some reason. So I’m there, sat on the floor playing with Lego with this kid and I look up to see my mate’s wife watching me from the kitchen doorway, she’s just got this knowing smile on her face and I just shrugged as if to say, ‘who knew?’

    I guess Lego bonds adults & infants…

    • I agree with the first part of that definitely! And I can see your point about discovering a connection with a child! There are a few kids I like in my circle, and I am never mean to any kids or anything. I just am not into it…..I just have no interest or instinct!

  6. Tyson Carter says:

    You might want to unfollow me the day I have kids then. 🙂 I cant imagine being more proud of anything then having a child. No one here has gone against what you say, Im guessing they decided not to comment rather than get in a fight.

    And Im not going to argue with you, just going to politely add that I fully disagree with what your saying, or feel the opposite. People post photos of pets and all sorts of things, none of it ever bothers me. Never seen someone so against children. But hey, thats your opinion and of course we all have them. I just wanted to make a comment in your new feature 🙂

    • I’m not against children for other people, they just aren’t for me. That’s actually a good thing, seeing as how many worthless parents there are out there. At least I am honest and realize it, thus not bringing yet another unwanted child into this scary, horrific world. I don’t care who has kids, but people don’t need to make them sound like the they’re special because they have them. Drug addicts, child molesters, and serial killers have children, it’s a natural process. When people have sex, it is bound to happen with some folks. Bearing children has been around since the beginning of time obviously, so it doesn’t make someone special to do something that a great majority of people do in every country and corner of the world. I am just saying, I am not going to downplay myself in favor of a parasite growing inside of me that is unwanted. Glad to hear you want kids! I do like some kids, just a very select few! I just don’t agree with people using them to get attention or to make them grow their egos even higher. Most people, barring sterility, can have children, it’s not like a Nobel Peace Prize. That’s all I was saying.

  7. scopophilia says:

    I believe the reason parents promote their kids so much is because they have no real lives of their own, or their lives are really boring and unproductive, so they try living their lives our through their children in order to make it more meaningful. I agree with you I like kids as long as someone else has to take care of them.

    The financial responsibility is enormous and enough to turn me off from it. My sister and her husband are working like crazy at their jobs just so they can save enough money to get their kids through college, so then I suppose their kids will grow up and work like crazy to send their kids through college so then they will do the same for their kids.Call me self-centered if you will, but in the end it all just sounds like a viscious, pointless cycle to me.

    • Yes, I completely agree. Too many folks live vicariously through their children. Like those fat ass moms who force their kids into pageants and dance and shit. Don’t fix your mistakes through your children! I don’t find you self-centered at all, I agree with your comment 100%. 🙂

      • scopophilia says:

        Great and I am really glad to see that you have picked yourself up and are going strong again. I still think you shoud check out the movie ‘Network’ whenever you get a chance as I think you will find it funny. It is a classic.

  8. “I think they stink, they’re loud, they’re annoying, and they’re too damn needy” This is one of my favourite comments ever! Speaking as a parent I actually agree with pretty much all of what you say. Of course parents should post pictures of their kids but sometimes its more a statement of look at what I have. It is the parent showing off & has nothing to do with the kid. It is the same has the “baby on board” stickers in cars. WTF are they for? Is the implication that I can drive like a dangerous twat & endanger other road users as long as there isn’t a baby in any of the other cars! That is ridiculous, the sticker is for the parent to advertise to the world that they have children. Instead of posting 1’000s of pictures of your children & feeling all warm inside for the following 10’000 “likes” & “Aww cute” posts. Spend time with the child. They might be stinky, loud & needy but they are also the most amazing human being in your life, treat them as such.

    • Haha, thank you for the comment, babe! I am glad to hear you’re in agreement with some of this! Of course, it is controversial, and I never said I hated children simply for the fact that they’re children. I just think they’re way overrated and not everyone wants them. It kills me when folks are like, when you gonna have kids? And I tell them, if I could afford surgery, I’d have my ovaries removed voluntarily. That’s just me, another facet of my personality, and I don’t knock people for having kids, I just think they’re not the only thing in the world.

      • There is nothing wrong with not wanting to have children. Its a personal choice & isn’t that everyone’s basic right? I would suggest not having your ovaries removed, condoms are cheaper & don’t require major surgery, well not unless your doing something seriously wierd & kinky with them lol As for people asking when you are going to have kids, that is kind of rude, personal & presumptious. It just stereotyping of the laziest kind.

  9. kloipy says:

    As a parent who tends to post pictures of my kid a fair amount, I will say it comes from a sense of pride of my kid and also to share with those I don’t see often in real life. I tend to stay away from posting all that much on FB anymore though. Every once and awhile I will, but I just don’t care enough. I think facebook has become too narcissistic where people need to post every little detail of their minute to minute life. It becomes an addiction where people get hooked on comments and likes and all that stuff. I was that way for awhile, but then I just got to the point where I just use it now to share my writing and stuff and for some networking stuff. That’s why I like Twitter better. I never feel like I need to post on there but I can if I want to and I’m not upset if it doesn’t get retweeted or anything like that.

    The biggest lie about being a parent is that once you have a kid, you love all kids. Not true at all

    • Glad you didn’t take offense to my post. Where ya been? I’ve been posting a lot and so far, you have been MIA! I am definitely addicted to likes and comments because that’s how we communicate these days, so it’s the new fad (see my post about Ways to Improve Communication), but I use myself to do it, not an innocent child whom I don’t want anyway. I love your honesty! I definitely agree that people get narcissistic with FB and their kids and whatnot. I love getting comments and likes because it makes me feel seen. I don’t get cocky or narcissistic. Actually, I feel worse until the next time I can get more likes. Damn social media.

      • kloipy says:

        I’ve been busy with work and life which cuts into the side stuff. I go through periods of being hooked online to then wanting nothing to do with it at all. I think it is a double edged sword. On one hand it is a great tool to get a lot of stuff out there for people to see and to meet people, but then on the other hand we become dependant upon it as well. Some days I want to throw the laptop out the window haha

  10. JFC says:

    Facebook is fairly evil. I don’t use it, couldn’t care less. In reality I have far more enemies than friends, so what good would that do? I have kids and pictures of them. They allow me about 3 pictures a year. Seems fair to me. I don’t share them with people other than family. Who gives a shit what my kids are doing other than me……and the occasional authority……

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